So we’ve all heard of International Women’s Day, but did you know there is also an International Men’s Day? While I don’t agree with all of the ideas of its supporters (some of them give me some strong misogynist vibes), I absolutely agree with this year’s theme: “Better Health For Men and Boys”.
In my last review, I talked about the ridiculous gender stereotypes pushed on all of us from an early age. Today I want to talk about children’s books that focus on some of these societal pressures and the health issues they create for children who feel the pressure of male gender stereotypes.
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Boys Will Be Boys
Society begins teaching children that there are “girl” and “boy” options very early in life. As adults, we all know that colors, baby dolls, soccer balls, and clothes have no gender. But children who are pressured by male gender stereotypes are often bullied for liking things that don’t fall into the “boy” category. We must encourage our children to be themselves, regardless of what “being a boy” means. It’s important not only to support our children in their interests and self expression, but to teach them to support other children who don’t fit into these societal ideas. These three books offer great examples of children who don’t fit into the gender stereotype box. They all open the door to conversations about gender stereotypes and how it’s okay to just be yourself.
Boys Don’t Cry
Because emotions are seen as “feminine”, and “feminine” traits are considered “weak”, boys are more likely to suppress their emotions, and to feel shame when they can’t. Suppressing emotions can lead to some serious mental health obstacles, but it also stunts emotional development. I don’t know about you, but I certainly hope my son grows up to be a man who is capable of expressing his emotions (both positive and negative) in a healthy, respectful way. These three books are perfect for helping our children understand that just like our toys, books, and hobbies, emotions have no gender.
The Strong Silent Type
When children are pressured to avoid weakness, we send the message that they should be strong…at all costs. This stereotype can have serious impacts. This concept can encourage boys and men to avoid doctor’s visits, because they believe they should “tough it out”. This same stereotype can prevent boys from coming forward when they are victims of assault, because society pressures them to “man up”. If we want to raise boys to advocate for themselves when it comes to their bodies, we have to encourage them to speak up. These three books discuss bodies, health, and consent, and they are a great to way to build a child’s confidence in speaking about their health.
Nurturing and raising children is often considered a “woman’s job”. This idea is so pervasive that it is sometimes called “babysitting” when a man actually looks after his own children. This societal pressure can hamper relationships between children and their fathers, often making the father feel like he has to be distant, and leaving the child to wonder why. We need to encourage dads to be nurturers, and teach our children that dads are just as capable of parenting as moms. These three books feature kind, patient, nurturing, and emotional father examples for children to learn these lessons from.
This is obviously not an all-encompassing list of the societal pressures our children face, but I think it’s a decent starting point. While this list is dedicated to masculine gender norms, I think it’s important we read them to all children. Any child can try to enforce these norms on themselves or others if they are not taught to question them.
I hope you enjoyed the list! Did I miss any good ones? What books are you reading to your little ones to encourage them to question societal expectations?